When will I stop forgetting and learn!
I woke up with a sore throat. If I think back I can recall having a headache a few days ago. It could have been the weather, or that I ran around with wet hair, or that I did not drink enough water, so I ignored it. I can also remember feeling tired and cold. This one is very easy to ignore being busy and living in the UK. But what should have finally triggered all buttons was that I ate starchy sugary food, which I usually don't.
I know exactly how a cold settles in my body, but still I ignored it.
Why? I have asked myself this question many many times throughout my life. Why do I keep forgetting what I know is good for me? Why do I ignore signs that tell me, it is not good for me?
I had a similar experience a while ago. It was when the moon and mercury were busy and easy to blame, and I felt slightly off. From experience I know that in these moments, nobody answers the phone, that people around me are busy or say the wrong words, so I end up suffering and having to solve whatever is bothering me on my own. That's what I did, I opened the Crisis Kit and did the "Last Resort Meditation". Yeah, I am learning after all.
Yesterday, somebody said to me he would need someone to do a meditation with him or it is not happening. Then he paused and said but his phone could remind him.... So tell Gotana, post it on a spot of your wall that you are likely to pass or put it in your medicine cabinet, where ever you are likely to find it in case you need it.
It is a simple meditation. Easypose, eyes closed. Hands in your lap, palms up, right on top of left palm, thumbs touching.
If you cannot keep your spine straight sit on the edge of a chair and place your feet flat on the floor hip width apart or use a cushion the same way, sitting on the floor. This will tilt your pelvis forward which will straighten your spine. (For tuning in and out before doing a meditation/kriya, please read here)
The mantra used in the Last Resort Meditation is Wahe Guru Wahe Guru Wahe Guru Wahe Jio repeated 8 times in one breath (breathing out). This might take a while to master. You will have to gently channel your breath so you have enough left for the last repetition.
You will notice chanting this mantra makes it impossible to think anything at all. And using your breath to its full capacity is refreshing and calming. And 11 minutes will fly by....
Peace.
When I turn around and look at 2014 I could easily only see loss. Loss of habits, fears and tears. Although this year had a lot to do with letting go, I am very grateful what this tough tough year had taught me.
Funny, 2014 I spent many hours traveling on the train.....
I have started 2014 with the White Tantric Yoga Day in London. The last time I participated in a course I was half way through my first pregnancy and faced all sorts of things in this Psychosynthesis course. I was thinking, this might be the last chance of doing something for myself, so I grabbed it. Wow that was challenging.....
So this time, the first time after a quite intense new motherhood, I was looking forward to doing something for myself again, working on my subconscious, and actually never prepared myself for any sort of challenge. And this was an error. Wow, I thought I was fit and disciplined, and wow, I was wrong. And still, this one day changed so much and was the best way of starting the year! Thanks for organizing this magic event every year!
Then straight into the next adventure.... Not sure how but one day in the summer of 2013 I found this link and it felt right after 15 years of Yoga practice to sign up for the Kundalini Yoga Teacher Training which would influence and change my life so much. And I must thank my boys of keeping up with me during this challenging time and most of all supporting me to do it and finish it!!!!
Kundalini Yoga passed my life several times before that, even a teacher moved to the remote island I was living on for a while and I could appreciate the benefits of it for quite some time. But finding a teacher and spending an entire year of intense practice made an enormous change in a very short time. So also a big thank you to my teacher Hari Har Ji!
Out of this grew the habit of taking a cold shower every morning. And I don't believe I am writing this but I really would not want to go back to having a hot shower again. It is very hard to shower in ice cold water every morning, and I admit some days it was rather more towards lukewarm than ice cold. But this freshness it brings is very hard to put into words. Thanks Hydrotherapy!!!!
I would also like to appreciate lemons at this point! Whether starting the day with a hot lemon, soothing various bugs the kids brought home from school or doing the moon/lemon fast every month, this yellow fruit is very special to me and I really started to appreciate it this year. The moon/lemon fast really changed a lot in my life. I have been following a diet or fasting plan all my life but this fast is the easiest and best way to integrate in my life, so far. There are 3 days in the months that support cleansing the body, full, new moon and the 11th day of the moon. While one of those 3 days means spending a day with water and lemon only the other 2 days are fairly easy to go through. So it is still challenging but the effects are so worth it. Again hard to explain but my attitude towards food changed so much and my body did as well. It seems that this short break is enough to lose a lot of waste products stored in the tissue and this feels great!
Who would think that designing this Valentine Cardigan would influence so many following designs throughout the year. I especially appreciate my woolly orange coat which is so warming and the boys christmas presents - a jacket and 2 nightgowns.
Although a lot of people still do not understand that it makes a big difference wearing clothes that are entirely made by hand without using a machine, this year, some did try and ordered hand stitched clothes by i can c u. Thanks to all my new and old customers and supporters!!!!
And: there might be arguments against spending that much money and effort but it just feels so different to the body, whether because it looses tension or the organic material just embraces you like a second skin :) And I love making these clothes, how great to be able to work and meditate at the same time!
And last I would like to mention and thank the Gregson Institute. I just happen to find it at the right time and it made Liverpool shine in another light, which was really needed.
But most of all I started teaching Kundalini Yoga there and this was a magic event in this year. Thanks.
Mmmmh if I spend more time reflecting I might find a hundred more things and people to appreciate but I think they will only end up in my diary.
So this year only highlights. Love Peace and Light!
I woke up with a sore throat. If I think back I can recall having a headache a few days ago. It could have been the weather, or that I ran around with wet hair, or that I did not drink enough water, so I ignored it. I can also remember feeling tired and cold. This one is very easy to ignore being busy and living in the UK. But what should have finally triggered all buttons was that I ate starchy sugary food, which I usually don't. 
